by Ian Hepburn
TUCARD: The Terrifically (And Unnecessarily) Complicated Adventure Race Duathlon. I am prefacing my race report with this expansion of the acronym so that I can emphasize the “Unnecessarily Complicated” aspect of this event. I will try my best to describe the rules that TUCARD participants had to follow in this year’s race, with the understanding that I probably can’t make them that clear in the space I have allotted. 
On Sept 21st, 2024 I participated in my first TUCARD, which is an annual event facilitated by the Marsh Island Trail Runners. I am not the first Strider to take part in this event (see previous TUCARD race reports form Amy Stabins https://www.centralmainestriders.com/news/race-report-tucard-2021 and https://www.centralmainestriders.com/news/race-report-tucard-2022). The TUCARD has elements of an orienteering challenge, i.e. navigating to points on a map, combined with running and biking (or other modes of conveyance, which I will get to in a moment). Complexity is added by the terrain itself, as it takes place in/on/around the trail networks north of Bangor like the Bangor City Forest, the Orono Bogwalk, the Caribou Bog Conservation Area, and other trails in that vicinity. The Veazie Railroad Bed runs through these trail systems as well, connecting them all. Some of these trails, like the railroad bed, are wide and flat, but they are connected by smaller, capillary like trails that are rougher, steeper, and difficult to move quickly on. 
On top of the physical challenges posed by landscape are the rules of the TUCARD. The boundaries of the race environment are defined by the “Shadow of the Pony” (you will notice a distinct equestrian theme to the TUCARD, especially if you go to their website and check out past TUCARDs). In this year’s TUCARD, there were four waypoints, whose coordinates were given to registered participants before race day. The race organizers did not provide any context or guidance about these points until the day before the race, when the “Sparkle Pony Rule” (more equestrian stuff) was revealed. This dearth of information until 24 hours before race day is a hallmark of the TUCARD. In the case of this year’s event, it was revealed that racers had to collect three of the four points, but there were some stipulations. 
WARNING: ATTEMPTED EXPLANATION OF COMPLICATED RULES FOLLOWS! 
In the map below, you see the Shadow of the Pony, which outlines the edges of the course. Within the Shadow, you can navigate to any of the points in any way you choose to, as long as it does not involve anything powered by a motor. So, if you decide to swim or paddle across a pond instead of running or biking around it, that is allowed. However, modifications to a racer’s time may be applied based on the surface they are racing on, as well as their form of locomotion. No modifications are applied if you are walking or running on a trail. However, if you are walking or running on a paved surface, a 2x modification is applied so that every minute of time spent on foot on a paved surface counts as two minutes of race time. If you are biking on a trail, a x1.5 modification is applied. If you ride your bike on a paved surface the timing modifications are compounded so that for every minute spent riding your bike on a paved road counts as three minutes of race time. However, time spent boating applies a x1/2 modification to your time, and time spent swimming applies a x1/4 modification. Part of this year’s Sparkle Pony Rule added a new form of locomotion; time spent dribbling a soccer ball applied a x3/4 modification to your time. So, if you spent 60 minutes navigating through swamps, thickets, brambles, and other environmental hazards while kicking a soccer ball, it only counted as 45 minutes. Racers are required to record their progress using Strava or other digital exercise logging system, and this is how the race staff can apply the appropriate time modifications to each racer’s raw time.

The other major twist in the race was that only two of the four points were available to be collected at a given time. In the :00 to :29 part of an hour, points ‘u’ and ‘n’ could be collected while points ‘b’ and ‘p’ were not available. In the :30 to :59 part of an hour, ‘b’ and ‘p’ were available and the other points weren’t. So, racers had to determine a strategy where they could get the points at the times they were available while navigating through the trails and waterways, and making decisions about things like if the speed afforded by a bike would be worth the time penalty. Complicating this even further were two points near the extreme north and south ends of the course, where you could get a token to invert the time rule for the availability of the points…. 
I think that if you have read this far you get the point that the TUCARD is more complicated than most other races. Fortunately, the post-race pot-luck lunch was refreshingly straightforward, with almost every 
participant bringing food and beverages to share and discussing their race strategies. The race organizers encourage pot-luck participation by offering to subtract five minutes off of your race time if you brought a food item to share. 
What I observed during the race was that many participants used bikes as their primary means to get around, but there were a lot of others who went on foot. As the ‘D’ in TUCARD stands for Duathlon, every racer had to employ at least two forms of locomotion, so racers without bikes had to swim/boat at least part of the course. In my case, I used a sturdy mountain bike to cover ground quickly. I felt pretty smart on the morning of the race as I had visited these trails a few weeks earlier to get an idea of the terrain and how easily navigable the trails were, and using this knowledge I was able to move quickly from the start to my first point (point ‘p’ on the map). My attitude changed pretty quickly once I tried to move east towards point ‘n’, and I discovered how steep, rooty, rocky, and swampy the terrain between the points was. My strategy fell apart and I was forced to make some decisions on the move. I had to choose between pushing hard over narrow steep trails to move directly to the next point with the distinct possibility of not making it in time and being forced to wait 30 minutes for it be available again, or moving south to the waypoint that would allow me to collect a token to reverse the time rule for point ‘n’. I opted to add distance to my route and collect the token, then proceeded to point ‘n’. I then headed for the northern half of the course to collect my last point, where I was again forced to make a decision between a direct route to the point, or to collect another time inversion token before getting to the last point. I won’t go into further detail, but I will state that when I crossed the finish line, I had travelled 16.7 miles in 2 hours, 29 minutes. 
I am writing this on October 30th, 2024, 39 days after the TUCARD, and the official standings haven’t been published yet. This is typical, as the scoring for the race is as complicated as the race itself. The race staff has to scrutinize the digital records of each participant’s route and apply the appropriate time modifiers to determine the final official times and standings, which has typically taken about a month. So I may have actually won the 2024 TUCARD (highly unlikely), or maybe I came in last (more plausible), but either way it was a blast. I enjoy orienteering races, and the creative challenges posed by the terrain and the race rules ensured that no part of the race was boring. If you are looking for a physical and mental challenge and aren’t easily frustrated by ambiguities and contradictions, then the TUCARD is the race for you. However, it will help to keep these things in mind: 
1) Preparation is helpful. If possible, acquaint yourself with the trails before the race 
2) You will not get all of the information you want about the race when you want it 
3) Mike Tyson said “Everybody has a plan until they get punched in the mouth”. That applies here, as the Sparkle Pony Rule serves as the metaphorical punch that will disrupt the strategy you might have formulated prior to the race, so keep your mind open and be flexible. 
I apologize for the long report, but there is a lot to this race and I highly recommend it, so hopefully I’ll see you at TUCARD 2025. 
To quote the classic film “The Outsiders”: Stay golden Pony Boy!